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Pregnancy after infertility and loss is a super exciting time! But it can also be difficult. After everything you have been through it is hard not to expect bad news, or feel like you are constantly waiting for the next curve ball.
But this is what you have worked so hard for! This is what all the countless shots, blood draws and ultrasounds were for. Let yourself celebrate, enjoy your win! You DESERVE IT!
The Anxiety of Pregnancy after Infertility
and Loss
Is this a thing, or is this a thing?! I honestly considered myself a pretty chill person, but after our fertility journey I couldn’t help but be anxious! I felt like I was constantly waiting for the next ultrasound. I wanted to see him, I wanted to know everything was okay. Even if I didn’t have a reason to think otherwise.
I thought okay, I’ll feel better once we get into the second trimester. But once I was there I couldn’t relax until we did the anatomy scan. We had a little hiccup on the anatomy scan, they thought he only had one kidney for a while. And then I was down a rabbit hole because of that.
Here’s the thing. Well, actually a few things. First, our baby is perfectly healthy. Turns out he has two kidneys, he had some follow up for a few months, but they are both there and normal. The main thing is, stressing out about it only made it worse. And there was nothing I could do about it at the time.
My suggestions if you find yourself spiraling.
- Stop and take some real deep breaths
- Get outside and go for a walk
- If you can’t go outside, put some good music on and have a dance party! (I did this several times while pregnant and even before, and it really helped me change the channel. I made a “good vibes” play list and it’s my go to)
- Listen to a guided meditation Headspace has a pregnancy series (just search pregnancy in the app) There are also several on YouTube.
- Last, but certainly not least….STAY OFF GOOGLE!
Physical Symptoms
Unfortunately just because you put your body through the wringer trying to get pregnant, it doesn’t mean it’s going to be easier once you are. It’s different for everyone, but I personally was pretty nauseas and exhausted from about week nine through week 14.
My doctor reminded me that these symptoms were good! Even if they didn’t feel that way. But it meant that my body was doing what it was supposed to to support our baby.
A few things that helped me were sour candies like sour patch kids or The Preggie Pop Drops, the more sour the better! I also took B6 every morning, and tried the Unison a few times but I didn’t think it helped that much. There are two types of Unisom, make sure it’s this one with the doxylamine, the other one has diphenhydramine which is Benadryl, not bad, but also not effective. I also took Zofran that my doctor prescribed. I tried my best to not take anything, but there were some days I had to.
Your Diet While Pregnant
The first trimester I lived on chips and salsa. It was pretty much the only thing that tasted good to me. I was going on the theory that I was getting my veggies in the salsa.
I wanted to have the PERFECT diet while I was pregnant. I wanted to eat all the right things to help my baby grow and be healthy and strong, I read Real Food For Pregnancy by Lily Nichols, and I really like it. I tried my best to follow it, but sometimes it simply did not happen.
All I can say is do your best, but give yourself some grace… and make sure you’re taking your prenatal. I was reminded more than a few times, that your body will prioritize your baby, meaning your baby will get what he/she needs, even if you don’t.
Thank heavens for prenatal vitamins! They fill in the gaps, especially when your diet is lacking. I really liked taking the Ritual prenatal, it’s got everything you need, but not a bunch of extra stuff. It also comes in a mint or lemon flavor. I prefer the mint to help with nausea. I also like the Garden of Life prenatal, which what my acupuncturist recommended.
Enjoy
Allow yourself to enjoy being pregnant. Start planning the nursery. Start buying baby things. Schedule your maternity pictures. Do all the things! Don’t get into your head so much that these nine months go by just to look back and think, I wish I would have enjoyed that more. You worked SO FREAKING HARD to get here! Celebrate!
I am celebrating with you! You’ve got this! Your baby is so lucky to have YOU as their mother!
xx,
Mollie
